Advice from Space: In Closing

Dear Writers and Readers,

This is the last of the messages you will receive from me.

The past week has been monumental. Okay, that may be an exaggeration. But the past week has been somewhat eventful, with the result that I have been recalled from my mission. Yes, I am going home!

This week, after breakfasting on some grape nutritional goo, I started to feel a little funny. The roof of my mouth was itchy. My ears were itchy and hot. My face was itchy and hot and red. It would have been another one of my interesting diversions, except that I knew where it was leading.

The Spinach Incident of First Grade began in a similar way. Inspired by Popeye, I begged my parents for canned spinach. They humored me and bought a can—despite their personal preference for fresh, leafy spinach (which I consistently refused to taste). For dinner that night, alongside the lasagna and a nice, crunchy salad that I declined to sample, there was a small bowl of hot, mushy, canned spinach.

Within minutes of my first bite, I had hives on my face and ears, my mouth was itching, and I started having trouble breathing. That was the day we found out about my spinach allergy.

So when I got that familiar itchy feel up in Space, I knew what to do and dispatched my emergency EpiPen with confidence.

The implications, though, were clear. I had developed an allergy to my nutritional goo.

Without nutritional goo, the only food I had were the snacks I had secreted on board–months-old Junior Mints and a few stale packs of Saltine crackers. After troubleshooting with Mission Control, we determined that the safest and most timely solution was to end my Mission and send me home.

As I write this, I am preparing for reentry. And by the time you read this, I will be home! With my cat, and with gravity, and sunsets, and weather! Although I’m excited about resuming life on Earth, I know my time in Space will be impossible to forget—and I wouldn’t want to, of course. Even the boredom, and isolation, and occasional hallucinations were worthwhile—though it certainly wouldn’t have been as enjoyable without your terrific correspondence.

My current Mission is ending, and before I start my next, I’m resting up and hoping to hear about your own Missions, in Space or otherwise. What adventures are you embarking on?

Sincerely,
Advice from Space

Photo by WikiImages (Pixabay)